Self-Sabotaging: A Deterrent To Growth And Development

Do you always find yourself procrastinating? Are you plagued with fear of failing? These behavior patterns are common to man. However, the sad truth is that you might be involved in a self-destructive habit known as self-sabotaging.

WHAT IS SELF-SABOTAGING?

This is the art of engaging in catastrophic behaviors that can be damaging to nearly every aspect of your life. Self-sabotaging occurs when we destroy ourselves physically, mentally, or emotionally or deliberately hinder our own success and wellbeing by undermining personal goals and values (Brenner, 2019). In other words, it refers to certain behaviors that keep us from becoming our best selves in diverse areas of our lives. This lifestyle prevents growth, progress, development, and success. Most times, self-sabotaging occurs consciously or unconsciously. Conscious self-sabotaging behaviors are acts done consciously to hinder progress. An example is going on social media rather than taking a walk to burn out the calories. Unconscious self-sabotaging acts involve undermining personal goals and values. Examples are negative feelings, perfectionism, imposter syndrome, and low self-esteem. 

COMMON SELF-SABOTAGING ACTS 

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1. Procrastination: The effects of procrastination include low self-esteem, failure, anxiety, missed opportunities, and poor decisions. Procrastination implies failure to carry out a particular task when one ought to. This is a self-destructive act due to the fact it not only limits our potential, but it also deters us from achieving excellence. Hence, for personal growth and development to happen, procrastination needs to be eliminated.
2. Indiscipline: This is a limiting factor when it comes to achieving optimal results in life. It involves wanting to achieve a particular result but not having the mental willpower for it. Indiscipline can surface in different patterns such as, inability to stick to a healthy lifestyle, watching tv instead of sleeping, and social media over exercise. Irrespective of how these acts seem insignificant, failure to stick to positive behavioral patterns can prove fatal in the long run thus hindering success.
3. Blame-Shifting when things go wrong: An easy thing to do is to shift the blame on others when things go wrong in your life. The hard part is taking responsibility for your actions. Consequently, shifting blame is a counterproductive activity. This is because it leads to negative emotions such as anger, resentment, and hatred. Most times, blaming other people might seem like the right thing because it shirks responsibility off your shoulder. Notwithstanding, it is important to note that responsibility is vital for the actualization of dreams and goals. Therefore, if you want to see success in all your endeavors, avoid the “blame-shifting” technique. 

However, just as every problem has a solution, there are ways in which a person can alter these destructive self-sabotaging behavioral patterns as I will be highlighting here:

1. Self-Awareness: Self-awareness is vital in curbing self-sabotaging practices. This is the ability to acknowledge initiating thoughts. Self-awareness helps in ascertaining the root cause of the self-sabotaging mechanisms and helps in seeking solutions. Another advantage of the self-awareness method is the presence of your conscious being, where you are aware of your toxicity, and you take calculated steps to avoid repeating the mistakes. 
2. Therapy: Therapy is a safe space to share what you are going through. Therapy is a great way to get rid of self-sabotaging acts. This is because it actively engages your communication skills and what you feel inside. And in turn, it creates a space for processing emotions, healing properly, and engaging in self-constructive mechanisms for growth, development, progress, and success.

I think we are all victims of self-sabotaging. However, what really matters is the conscious efforts we make to be better for ourselves and the world at large. If you read this and can relate, do not be too judgmental of yourself. Just practice these laid down tips and watch your life transform.