Deep Thoughts: Paying For The Crimes
At the beginning of this year, an online tutorial was paid for to aid me with an exam I had to write. The payment gave me a space of 5 months to prepare for the exam but I needed three months to really prepare. I jumped into it and started following the schedule only to find out that for the past four months, I had only covered 2 weeks’ worth of work. TWO WEEKS. It dawned on me that I now have to cover 10 weeks’ work in just about 5 weeks. Can I do it? Let’s go to court and find out.
Court Clerk: Today we have suit no MC/XXI/2016 in the matter of the State vs Grace
Judge: Where are the counsels? Who is the counsel for the prosecution?
Prosecutor announces his presence
Judge: Who is the counsel for the defendant?
The counsel of the defendant announces his presence
Judge: What is the case for?
Court Clerk: My Lord, the defendant has been allegedly accused of the following crimes: Procrastination, Indiscipline, aiding and abetting the time thief, faffing, excessive slumber, laziness, complaining, vacillation, dithering and delaying tactics and should be held accountable for her crimes and sentenced to jail.
Defendant’s Lawyer: “My Lord, it is true that in light of what the defendant has been accused of, she may seem guilty, but I beg you to look at the charges carefully in view of the following points;
The state of the nation is a solid reason for the defendant to be found at fault in the crimes listed above. We all know that the current economic situation does not give one opportunity to be productive especially in the case of fuel scarcity. You, my Lord, are a testimony to that as this court could not seat last week because of lack of fuel.
Furthermore, the constant power failure along with bad weather, traffic, and noise pollution have been limiting factors to her study life. These are all circumstances that could not be helped and as such the defendant should not be held liable. Convicting her of the alleged charges means blaming her for factors beyond her control and would totally be against her human right. Thank you
Prosecutor: The defendant’s lawyer has made valid points and it is true that the court cannot charge the defendant based on natural occurrences but I beg to differ. The evidence put forward to the court factually points out that, the defendant lived beyond those natural occurrences. From the transaction bills brought forward as evidence to the court, throughout this period, the defendant used her generator which gave her the necessary light she could have used to study.
Secondly, from reports given by her family members, she always got home before 7 pm giving her enough time to study before sleeping meaning she was not hindered by the traffic of any form. Furthermore, according to the written statement by the defendant collected by the police, she always left home early in the mornings with the intentions to study but somehow always got distracted by sleep or other things.
Looking at this case critically, my lord, the defendant is guilty of all charges and should be sentenced, she had total disregard for her studies, wallowed in distractions, faffed around and made a lot of noise without doing anything. All of her defenses would be petty excuses that would only reveal more of her incompetency. And as such your time should not be wasted in giving your verdict as it is quite clear that the defendant is guilty.
Court Clerk: The judge may now take a time out to make a verdict
Court in recession… Court back in session
Court Clerk: The judge has reached a decision
Judge (in an old cracked voice): Um…the humble court from the talks of the claims and issues at hand, may it please pronounce that Grace is guilty of all charges and is liable to a fine of 4hrs per day from the hours of 4pm to 7pm daily for a period of 40 days after this sentence. Failing which on or before the 10th of June shall be guilty of 6 months imprisonment.
Well I got a huge fine to pay or I am going to be jailed in failure. It is not a happy situation but I have come to realise that in life one way or another we pay for our little inconsistencies, be it procrastination, laziness, tardiness, deceit, etc. just to mention a few vices we let rule our lives. The best choice is to pay on time or be jailed.
I hope you have learnt something from my misdeeds, see you again next week.
Jaa Mata!